The young man and his car.

A young man is staggering about drunk with a key in his hand.

  - What's going on 'ere then? Says a passing policeman.
  - They stole me bloody car! shouts the drunk.
  - Where did you last see it? asks the copper.
  - On the end of this key! wails the drunk.

The policeman looks him over and says,
  - Are you aware, sir, that your penis is hanging out of your trousers?
  - Holy shit! screams the drunk, they got me girlfriend too!

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