The young man and his car.
A young man is staggering about drunk with a key in his hand.
- What's going on 'ere then? Says a passing policeman.
- They stole me bloody car! shouts the drunk.
- Where did you last see it? asks the copper.
- On the end of this key! wails the drunk.
The policeman looks him over and says,
- Are you aware, sir, that your penis is hanging out of your trousers?
- Holy shit! screams the drunk, they got me girlfriend too!