Hopeless situation!
This is a true story from the WordPerfect help line. Needless to say, the help desk
employee was fired;
however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for
"Termination without Cause".
Actual dialog of a former Word perfect Customer Support employee:
- Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?
- Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
- What sort of trouble?
- Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
- Went away?
- They disappeared.
- Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
- Nothing.
- Nothing?
- It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type.
- Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
- How do I tell?
- Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?
- What's a sea-prompt?
- Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
- There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
- Does your monitor have a power indicator?
- What's a monitor?
- It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
- I don't know.
- Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
power cord goes into it.
Can you see that?
- Yes, I think so.
- Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
- .......Yes, it is.
- When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were
two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
- No.
- Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
- .......Okay, here it is.
- Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.
- I can't reach.
- Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
- No.
- Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?
- Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because
it's dark.
- Dark?
- Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
- Well, turn on the office light then.
- I can't."
- No? Why not?
- Because there's a power outage.
- A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the
boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?
- Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.
- Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got
it.
Then take it back to the store you bought it from.
- Really? Is it that bad?
- Yes, I'm afraid it is.
- Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
- Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer.